When most PR’s see Nicki Minaj heading their way at Fashion Week, they immediately issue a CODE NO which includes the following steps: turn off the lights and hit the “in case of Nicki” button that shuts the door of the venue and throws up a “Cancelled. Designer Died. No Collection To See Here. Etc.” message. So I can only assume the person who let Nicki and the toxic fumes that waft off the poisonous spider legs glued... 

….and I am a hydrangea-less girl. Yep, if you want to win Madonna‘s heart, just take a note out of Keith Carradine‘s “Ways To Tame A Monster” handbook, and give her some daisies (just like he did in the “Material Girl” video, pre-roidy bod and pillows in her cheeks). Don’t give her those flowers that give her nightmares (like the nightmares her toy boy suffers when he imagines his nutsack being mangled... 

If you’re going to chain to me to something, a sexy gold clutch would be preferable to a bed post (achey arms after 10mins just aren’t a turn-on). So this metallic handcuff clutch by Louis Vuitton which chained itself to Angelina Jolie‘s wrist at the “Moneyball” premiere, is mon clutch du jour. It’s also much sexier than a ball and chain ( AKA wedding ring) which makes it one public display of affection I’m... 

If you’re not on the actual frow for New York Fashion Week which kicked off yesterday, then tuning in to the live streams of the shows is probably the next best thing. So here’s a guide to the collections and all the where’s, and when’s: • Peter Som: 10 a.m. on Friday, September 9, at livestream.com/petersom • Luca Luca: 11 a.m. on Friday, September 9, at youtube.com/liverunway • Jason Wu: 1 p.m. on Friday, September... 

Remember when Marty McFly exclaimed “Power Laces! Alriiight!” in 1989, pulling on a pair of Nike Air Mags which tightened and fastened automatically? Well 22 years later, an ultra limited edition Back To The Future Nike Air Mag trainer is going up for auction on eBay each day for the next 10 days. The boots are not an exact copy of those seen in the 1989 movie, Back To The Future II, but they’re as close as you can get to the once futuristic... 

The noms have been announced for the biggest event in the fashwan calender, The British Fashion Awards 2011. This year there will also be two new awards  - the Red Carpet Award gong, which gives ‘recognition to a British designer who is creating global awareness of their designs in the media’ and the Menswear Award which will go to an ‘innovative and directional designer who is emerging as an influential force in British Menswear’.... 

Roy Halston Frowick, or Halston to you and I, is the designer who began his career as a milliner for Bergdorf Goodman (designing Jacqueline Kennedy‘s iconic pillbox hat), who went on to become “the best designer in America” in 1972 (Newsweek). After launching his eponymous womenswear label in 1968, which included heavyweight cashmere evening dresses, jersey sarongs (a design aesthetic since emulated by Diane von Furstenberg)... 

I don’t care what you say about Madge grinding her crotch all over toy boys who are younger than the shoulder pads in her cheeks or performing a midnight beauty ritual of slathering her entire body with blood from a virgin’s inaugural menstrual cycle; I STILL LOVE HER!! And despite dressing like she should be lying in bed while yelling at Little Lola to feed the cats, most days, I don’t care that she wore a dress that looked... 

Dolly Parton wants us to know that this is what her arms would look like if she was wearing 100-yard long shoulder pads, because you know how Dolly likes to make a grand entrance. Specifically, a grand entrance that involves never slipping through a doorway sideways (for obvious reasons). This is the legend performing on her ‘Better Day’ World tour in Liverpool. The same show which also attracted some old queens with old downtrodden wigs... 

The Agent Provocateur Autumn/Winter 2011 campaign has arrived, featuring former muse to US fashion designer Zac Posen and notorious party girl, Paz de la Huerta (to remember her surname I always think of Herta frankfurters, but with a ‘u’). The Boardwalk Empire star appears in both the print campaign shot by Johan Renck, and a series of short films on the official Agent Provocateur website and Youtube. In the campaign, De la...