Zit puss, coldsores and dirty fingernails…hurrah, it could only be dreamboat Doherty (aka, Pete), seen here above with man boobs and particularly bad taste in fancy layering, at the launch of his new joo-ree in London last night (Dec 1). Yes you heard us right, HIS NEW JOO-REE range. Which means he didn’t steal that fugly gold thing hanging off his neck or find it on the pub floor. It’s actually be designed by his very own post-coke... 

Never mind those yawn-inducing guitar twanging tunes that make us want to jump of a high-rise building and hopefully land on her face at the bottom… This first public pic of the singer with new boyf Jake Gyllenhaal is the latest thing to get our blood boiling… Firstly, WTF is Jake Gyllenhaal doing going out with her??!!! She’s seriously fugly sans make-up and hair crimpers; and she’s doing that ‘he’s my man, look... 

RIP OUR EYE BALLS OUT NOW why don’t you?! Because this picture of Katie Waissel’s nan in her grots and some serious flappage of the ole tum, must surely be one of, if not, THE WORST image of a codger hooker we’ve ever seen (although Wayne Rooney would probably think she’s cracking). Chinny Weasel’s nan has semi-stripped (gah if she went completely starkers) for New! magazine, and yes Max Clifford is doing his best to make us forget the... 

Not content with being the star of Littlewoods ad campaigns (come on….Vogue *strikes a pose in a horrid lycra-wool mix jumper*), and wife to cheating fugly, Wayne; Coleen Rooney is doing her best to ditch the label of lazy wag who waves at her fans from the windows of her customised ride (the one that punches our eyeballs out); by launching her third fragrance called ‘Butterflies’. Here’s a picture from the photocall in London (above)... 

HE’S A GAY IN WAITING. THE END.  Read More →

From this…. To this… Still looks demented and mentally unstable to us, just with shorter hair, less boob-age and no teeth grinding. But apparently Kerry Katona thinks she’s on the mend from being a coke-hoovering, booze bashing wacked out sleb mess all thanks to leaving ex-hubby Mark Croft….oh, and being taken on by the same management company who revived Peter Andre‘s career and who have now secured her a fitness DVD.... 

Things must be tough for Charlotte Church since Gavin walked out on her, judging by the interesting get-up she rocked whilst outdoors..YES..OUTDOORS in London yesterday. Never mind the fact the island of Britain is undergoing sub-zero temperatures right now, but you’ve gotta have some serious balls to wear this ensemble in public….or just a rather large camel toe. STYLISTS NEEDED!! *WARNING* DIVORCED WOMAN WITH AN ATTACK OF THE FUGS ON... 

You know how during dance and singing contests, the contestants normally lose weight and shape up…. Mary Byrne is not doing either. The End. Instead she appears to be getting bigger (bless the stylist) and also being swallowed (whole, like) by an argyle knit from Florence & Fred by Tesco’s (ARF, see what we did there). Unless of course we’ve got her all wrong and she’s actually auditioning to be a gurner…..just in... 

Er….legs begin…..boots end where….much? N-Dubz singer Tulisa Contostavlos shows what we mean when we use the phrase ‘bloody awful fake tan’. Innit, as Scrappy, Dippy, Dappy…or whatever he’s called…would say.  Read More →

ARGH!!! STOP, STOP….OUR EYES CAN’T TAKE THIS MUCH FUGNESS. AND THOSE SHOES…..??!!! DID SHE STEAL THEM OFF SOME POOR, UN-SUSPECTING GRANDMA?  Read More →