Once upon a time….. If you removed all of Dawn French‘s ribs, cinched her in with a girdle made of wishful thinking, vacuum sealed her and put her in Dusty Springfield‘s “Wishin and Hopin” video, she still wouldn’t have a 22-inch waist like Megan Fox. Fast forward to Nov 6 2011…. Dawn has obviously been spending some time with a mug of weight loss and licking fat-free hummus off of a carrot stick. Look at... 

Celebrities have kibble for brains, so they will wear whatever some insane gay stylist tells them to wear. Proof, Katy Perry in the picture below. But Jeremy Scott, FASHION DESIGNER (the clue’s in the job title), you are supposed to be smarter than this. This is a case of JUST SAY NO! This is all kinds of giving us a headache.  Read More →

It’s back to the botox clinic for LULU! Mop Head and her smug-arsed partner Brendan Cole were given the heave-HO on “Strictly Come Prancing” last night – and it was a bittersweet moment for us. Yes Lulu makes our face nerves hurt, but she’s the only one that got any emotion out of us. When we watched her fuck up the dance moves EVERY WEEK, we had to sit on our fists (not in the nasty way) to keep them from punching... 

The day the music died…. Why oh why Johnny or The Risk thought they had been gifted the voices of George Michael or a boyband that can actually sing (hmm…we’re still trying to think of one??), is beyond us – but every week our eardrums were close to bursting. Both bands were booted off CrapFactor last night, proving why people need to pay more attention in school or just pay for a singing coach. Nobody wants to hear someone... 

  The Hoff presented an award to Lady Copy + Paste at the MTV Europe Music Awards last night (one of four gongs she won at the ceremony in Belfast), and his face was the face you see when you drop acid and stare at someone dressed as a giant pencil shaving in front of you, for an hour straight. Yep, he’s totally thinking “THE FUCK?!” The rest of the foolery and winners are here in case you missed it.  Read More →

Let’s be honest, David and Rocco have always looked uncomfortable around the crazy lady who insists they call her ‘Mother’. Which is why they’ll both be moving out of home soon to attend Marlborough College – the £30,300 a year Wiltshire school for people with real British accents (basically they never throw a “blimey” or a “bollocks” into a conversation), which counts Princess Eugenie, Otis... 

Glitter fell from the skies when we saw our favourite princess Zac Efron had blessed Halloween as the mincing officer from Reno 911. This is the kind of look that makes us raise an ass cheek and hope he pulls out his baton and performs an internal investigation on the hood of our car. Talking of batons….let’s start our mourning…..Zac’s appears to be a curled up hamster.  Read More →

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….Jessica Biel on the cover of ELLE US. Looking like a waitress in Chilli‘s Mexican restaurant in Whiteleys shopping centre – the kind that wear too many bangle bracelets and speak Spanglish.  Read More →

Remember when some people couldn’t believe that Scary Spice was going to have three kids with three different fathers (example: ”Having 3 kids by 3 different fathers is nothing to be proud of, love”)!!!!!!  Well naturally we responded with, the hell are they throwing shade at? Of course this is something to be proud of! It means that Scary has equal opportunity ovaries and an International womb house of fetuses in her body. That...