Eva Longoria…..pretty from the front, apart from her deformed legs, which seem to have graced the front cover of a magazine called Access Direct TV, whoever the fuck that is….anyone??

With a sleb this famous on your front cover, sloppy and tardy Photoshop is a no-no, or so you would think anyway…

But as you can see from her legs, particularly downwards from her knee on the left, it’s a case of broken matchsticks…noodles or just someone being pissed in charge of the re-touch tool. And it made us laugh it did.

We’ve heard of stars looking slimmer, but we’re pretty darn sure Eva wasn’t aware her calves and ankles would be shaved off: and what’s with the vajeen skimming frock again? Is it just us, or is Eva fond of being able to bend over and make us scream of late? But the bow….THE BOW?! WTF? Does it twist like a propeller and send her off into the sleb-os-sphere. Course not, that’s just us being silly arses.

Anyway, we don’t much like the dress and whoever styled the red ribbon around her pins could have at least opened their eyes.

Basically what we’re saying is, this cover is shit. The End.